I discovered art journaling as a process many years ago - I called it "doodling." It often engendered a critical voice inside that said things along the lines of "what's wrong with you?" and "why can't you keep your mind on your notes?" and "what a waste of time and paper!" The funny thing is, I could not stop. Whenever I had a piece of paper and a pen or a pencil, such as at school, my margins would fill themselves in with doodles and shapes - botanical, geometric, abstract, tangled, smooth, sharp, pointy, dark and light. Sometimes I would look at them and wonder where they came from. This is a peek into my growing up. And it says a lot about the arid landscape of my creativity during my first three decades.
After I gave birth to three daughters in three years, and discovered BodySoul Rhythms and began the ever deepening path of individuation and consciousness, I saw these images appearing again and again in all my notes, in my book margins and in my dream journals. Soon, I bought some colored pencils, and then expanded into even drawing on white paper. The inner critic was very loud. My critic's judgment was harsh and vicious as it tore at the humble creations like The Furies of Aeschylus. But I'm grateful for my love of Greek myth, because it teaches me that this is but one part of a many faceted story.
For the last twenty years I have dedicated several journals a year to my creative life. I buy them, receive them as gifts, make them myself, and create them out of all kinds of non-traditional materials. These journals hold my dreams, my thoughts, my feelings, my creative life and the expressions of my soul. Many of the pages are filled with private thoughts and feelings that I would not share with anyone ever. And they are covered with layers and layers of paint, pencil, ink, paper, and other mediums that come to hand. Including earth elements such as dirt and water and plant materials.
To me, they are art. With a lower case a. Not to be displayed or judged. But to be experienced. To be held, transformed, abandoned and taken up again. Sometimes I tear them up and make other pages. Sometimes I work small and layer these bits into a larger page. I share some of the pages here. Not as a way of seeing proficiency at realism, but as an inspiration to anyone's soul who has been yearning for some tangible way of simple singing one's song. Feel free to email me for more information and other resources. cindyjjacobs@gmail.com
You can find me on Instagram @artandsoulcindy
Fabulous and inspiring, Cindy! Thanks so much for sharing. Polly